THE BEST LEADERS POSSESS RELATIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Build the relationship-enhancing skills needed for business and career success.

“Today we have more ways to communicate but we’re connecting less than ever before,” says Adam C. Bandelli, Ph.D. An industrial organizational psychologist, Bandelli has observed the devastating impact of both the pandemic and increased reliance on technology on people’s ability to create the kinds of relationships needed not only for business and career success, but for personal satisfaction and growth. In his book, “Relational Intelligence: The Five Essential Skills You Need to Build Life-Changing Relationships,” Dr. Bandelli draws on extensive research to introduce the concept of Relational Intelligence and explains why it is at the heart of effective leadership. He then lays out his five-part framework for developing these critical relationship-building skills.

Dr. Bandelli defines Relational Intelligence as the ability to successfully connect with people and build strong, long-lasting relationships. This is critical in business, where leaders need to create cultures that are relationship-oriented and foster engagement from their employees. “Everyone, not only leaders and managers, should focus on building relationships that are based on trust and mutual accountability,” he explains. “Building strong relationships is the way to have life-changing influence on others.”

Having worked with hundreds of CEOs and senior executives to strengthen their abilities to inspire and influence their teams, Dr. Bandelli has identified the five essential skills that comprise Relational Intelligence. In Part One of his book, he lays out each one, along with practical steps for developing each skill. These include:

■ Establishing Rapport—This skill focuses on the initial stages of relationship-building, as rapport is the starting point for developing trust. In business, this plays out in recruitment and hiring, as well as in team dynamics and customer relations. Key areas to work on to hone the ability to establish rapport involve making a first impression, drawing others into conversation, and finding common ground.

■ Understanding Others—Strong relationships can’t exist unless you understand one another. This involves developing the ability to ask questions, gather information, and read social cues. Dr. Bandelli addresses developing emotional intelligence, practicing active listening, and seeking out feedback.

■ Embracing Individual Differences—“When you acknowledge and appreciate the differences of other people, you’re able to communicate more effectively with them,” the author writes. This opens the door for creativity and real innovation. Dr. Bandelli details the importance of actively pursuing diversity of thought, as well as focusing on authenticity and getting comfortable with oneself.

■ Developing Trust—Trust takes time and requires people to be vulnerable with one another. Without a strong foundation of trust, relationships cannot thrive. Trust in our professional lives translates into higher levels of cooperation, team effectiveness, and job performance. It enables leaders to galvanize and motivate their people.

■ Cultivating Influence—This is the capacity to have a positive impact on the lives of others. In the business world, cultivating influence is about leadership. It’s about the use of non-coercive tactics to direct and coordinate the activities of others. When leaders can influence the behaviors and actions of others, the result is greater organizational commitment, job satisfaction, collaboration, and employee well-being.

In the second part of the book, the author focuses on how Relational Intelligence can be used in all aspects of life—in the workplace, in friendships, and in family and romantic relationships. By using examples from his own experience and those of his colleagues and others, Dr. Bandelli brings his lessons to life.

“Relational Intelligence enables you to effectively engage and interact with people from different backgrounds, diverse cultures, and experiences. It allows you to understand and appreciate different interests, values, and beliefs of others. It helps leaders better fulfill their roles of cultivating inclusive, stimulating, and respectful work environments. And it’s relevant at work, at home, and in all aspects of our lives,” attests Dr. Bandelli.